Shooting Stars.

I went on amazon and bought all the top books on baby sleep and development. I read through them all, as well as several blogs and sleep websites. I gathered lots of advice.

You shouldn’t sleep train at all, before a year, before 6 months, or before 4 months, but if you wait too late, your baby will never be able to sleep without you. College-aged children never need to be nursed, rocked, helped to sleep, so don’t worry about any bad habits. Nursing, rocking, singing, swaddling, etc to sleep are all bad habits and should be stopped immediately. White noise will help them fall asleep. White noise, heartbeart sounds, etc, don’t work. Naps should only be taken in the bed, never in a swing, carseat, stroller, or when worn. Letting them sleep in the carseat or swing will damage their skulls. If your baby has trouble falling asleep in the bed, put them in a swing, carseat, stroller, or wear them.

Put the baby in a nursery, bed in your room, in your bed. Cosleeping is the best way to get sleep, except that it can kill your baby, so never, ever do it. If your baby doesn’t die, you will need to bedshare until college.

Use the same cues as night: cut lights, keep the house quiet and still. Differentiate naps from nightly sleep by leaving the lights on and making a regular amount of noise. Keep the room warm, but not too warm. Swaddle the baby tightly, but not too tightly. Put them on their back to sleep, but don’t let them be on their backs too long or they will be developmentally delayed. Give them a pacifier to reduce SIDS. Be careful about pacifiers because they can cause nursing problems and stop your baby from sleeping soundly. If your baby sleeps too soundly, they’ll die of SIDS.

Don’t let your baby sleep too long, except when they’ve been napping too much, then you should wake them. Never wake a sleeping baby. Any baby problem can be solved by putting them to bed earlier, even if they are waking up too early. If your baby wakes up too early, put them to bed later or cut out a nap. Don’t let them nap after 5 pm. Sleep begets sleep, so try to get your child to sleep as much as possible. Put the baby to bed awake but drowsy. Don’t wake the baby if it fell asleep while nursing.

You should start a routine and keep track of everything. Not just when they sleep and how long, but how long it has been between sleep, how many naps they’ve had per day, and what you were doing before they slept. Have a set time per day that you put them to bed. Don’t watch the clock. Put them on a schedule. Scheduling will make your life impossible because they will constantly be thrown off of it and you will become a prisoner in your home.

Using CIO will make them think they’ve been abandoned and will be eaten by a lion shortly. It also causes brain damage. Not getting enough sleep will cause behavior and mental problems, so be sure to put them to sleep by any means necessary, especially CIO, which is the most effective form. Extinction CIO is cruel beyond belief and the only thing that truly works because parents are a distraction. The Sleep Lady Shuffle and Ferber method are really CIO in disguise or Controlled Crying and so much better than Extinction. All three of these will prevent your child from ever bonding with you in a healthy way. Bedsharing and gentler forms of settling will cause your child to become too dependent on you.

Topping the baby off before bed will help prevent night wakings. When babies wake at night, it isn’t because they are hungry. If the baby wants to nurse to sleep, press on the baby’s chin to close its mouth. Don’t stop the baby from nursing when asleep because that doesn’t cause a bad habit. Be wary of night feeds. If you respond too quickly with food or comfort, your baby is manipulating you. Babies can’t manipulate. Babies older than six months can manipulate.
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Clean when the baby cleans. Don’t worry. Stress causes your baby stress and a stressed baby won’t sleep.

My face is aching from clenching my jaw so much lately. I dont even know that I’m doing it. I just feel so pissed or stressed all the time and I cant do anything about it because Connor should grow up around smiles. But Jake can get angry and yell and swear and carry on when he gets frustrated with a stupid video game.

We got a letter from our landlord saying that we owe more than $3000 in rent. Jake has not worked a shift in over 2 months nor has he looked for a job or even called centerlink. He has spent so much of the last 2 years unemployed and has so much debt building up, and does not give a single fuck about supporting or even contributing to his family.

joshpeck:

do not let anyone make you feel like shit for putting yourself first

you are the only person that is guaranteed to be with you throughout your whole life so you might as well have a loving relationship with yourself

There’s no point to a guy yelling, “Hey sexy baby” at me out of the passenger window of a car as it speeds past. Even if I was into creepy misogynists and wanted to give him my number, I couldn’t. The car didn’t even slow down. But that’s okay, because he wasn’t actually hitting on me. The point wasn’t to proposition me or chat me up. The only point was to remind me, and all women, that our bodies are his to stare at, assess, comment on, even touch. “Hey sexy baby” is the first part of a sentence that finishes, “this is your daily message from the patriarchy, reminding you that your body is public property”.
“Any woman is just as capable of being a hero as any man.” ( — Hayao Miyazaki) +
a person’s a person no matter how small
Dr. Seuss, a pro-choice advocate who publicly donated to Planned Parenthood and actively sued pro-life organizations for using this as a slogan. Stop using this to justify your bullshit pro-life ideals. Not even the original author of the phrase agrees with you.  (via celestialfucker)

acidictrips:

cantankerous-canoodle:

submissivefeminist:

Olivia Benson, the most influential woman of my early adulthood, telling you what’s up.

idk i tried to scroll past this but it’s too perfect

if you don’t love benson you’re wrong

odins-one-eyed-fuck:

icy-mischief:

thorkitastic:

high-functioningfangirl:

Justice Finishing Pose by Thor & Loki (Thor the Dork World)
"I am the great Saiyaman!!!"

[x]

[x]

Thor and Loki watch Dragon Ball Z

L O L

THIS KIND OF ADORABLE SHOULDNT BE LEGAL

loki-spaz-moments:

agelfeygelach:

mewtwoofficial:

savesthebrian:

kavaeric:

the-impersonal-akigawa:

dampsandwich:

good news

he looks super proud like ‘ur goddamn right’
you go man you go

Camo turban

Anyone who serves a country so that I can practice religion freely should be able to practice theirs freely as well. It’s about time, congrats!

the camo turban is the best thing i’ve seen this decade

I need a G.I. Joe character modeled on this man. Right now.

This makes me really happy c:

loki-spaz-moments:

agelfeygelach:

mewtwoofficial:

savesthebrian:

kavaeric:

the-impersonal-akigawa:

dampsandwich:

good news

he looks super proud like ‘ur goddamn right’

you go man you go

Camo turban

Anyone who serves a country so that I can practice religion freely should be able to practice theirs freely as well. It’s about time, congrats!

the camo turban is the best thing i’ve seen this decade

I need a G.I. Joe character modeled on this man. Right now.

This makes me really happy c:

skykai:

johnhawkens:

tmirai:

wethatkindoforc:

isei-silva:

iraffiruse:

Frozach Submitted

the pizza one!

I just want to come all over these

Good design gets me going, okay???

Oh man let me tell you how many boners I get from good packaging.

Several.

AHHH THOSE TEA BAGS!!!!

I love unique designs, especially packaging. I remember how my Elgato Video Game Capture HD was packaged, and I have to give the designers credit. I just like what becomes more than just the standard package.

foreveralone-lyguy:

Get in this fucking box. I’ll let you out in a few days.

foreveralone-lyguy:

Get in this fucking box. I’ll let you out in a few days.

humorous-blog:

kissedthystones:

I’m just trying to get lunch, not have an existential crisis.

▒

humorous-blog:

kissedthystones:

I’m just trying to get lunch, not have an existential crisis.